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The show is over.The lights have gone dark, applause faded, and life snaps back to what it always was. I wake with that heavy tug in my chest—that low-grade depression that sneaks in once the adrenaline burns off. Maybe it’s the booze. Maybe it’s the weed. Maybe it’s just the weight of hard living pressing down. But really? Deep down? I know what it is. It’s the absen …

The lights are blinding.The audience is packed.My heart pounds like a war drum, but I’m breathing through it. This is it. No turning back. Fuck. What if I forget my lines?What if I miss my cue? I peek through the curtain. My mom and stepdad are out there, front row, smiling, ready for a performance they will have no idea how to process. I laugh to myself—they’re about to witness …

hoose?Why is what I’m doing so wrong?Why can’t I have both—the freedom of creation and the grind of the hustle? My mind was a thunderstorm, clouds colliding, loud as hell with no off switch. I stumble into the kitchen, grab a glass of water, hold the counter to keep from spinning. Trying to retrace the night. It started at Greene’s place. A few blocks away. Same neighborh …

I was all in now, deep in the world of community theatre. And man… what a scene. The juxtaposition of it all was wild. One minute I’m in the streets, flipping pounds and spending weekends under the neon glow of a club, and the next I’m standing in a circle at a Unitarian church, playing theatre games with actors. It was surreal. I kept my worlds separate—or at least, I tr …